Why I'm Not Angry About What I Went Through
When I think back on my storms it’s so easy for me to get angry. It’s so easy for me to sit there and keep asking God why He put me through what I went through. So many things were hitting me at once that I didn’t know what to do. My life was in shambles. I wasn’t functioning the way I should. Everything I tried to do failed miserably. And when my marriage was falling apart, I was sinking deeper and deeper into despair! My depression was at its worse! And for a while, I was angry. I was angry at myself for allowing myself to fall for the lies and deceit. I was angry when I thought about all of the years I put into this toxic relationship. But as I began my road to recovery, I realized that I had nowhere to go but up. God showed me that I had the ability to fly if I would just trust in Him. Below is a list of reasons as to why I’m not angry about what I went through.
I turned my pain into a purpose
When I began documenting and journaling what I was going through, I realized that I wouldn’t wish this type of pain on anyone. Then one day I realized that I cannot the only one going through this storm. A lot of people don’t like to talk about their storms and what they went through to make to where they are. So I set out to share my story as a way of showing others that it’s ok to open up. It’s ok the let go and let God take the lead on your life.
God used that time in my life to mold me
We all make mistakes. And goodness knows that most of us refuse to make those same mistakes and fall into the same traps. I know what I experienced all those years are something that I never want to go through again. In going through what I went through, God showed me what I was truly capable of. He showed me the masterpiece that I could become.
It brought me so much closer to Him
It’s no secret that I turned to gospel music in order to begin my healing process. My journey showed me that God never left. He was always there, waiting for me to lean on Him. I had a whole plan for my life. But God showed me that He had a bigger and better plan for me. All I had to do was rely on him. And now I devote my time to Him because I know He is walking with me.
So no matter what we go through, the journey is never easy. We’re human. We’re all going to do things that we’ll regret. Every time I look back at what I went through, I remember that God used that time to empower me. Every time I got knocked down, God made me stronger. And everyday, I thank God for creating the masterpiece in me, just as He’s creating the masterpiece in you.
Remember, Always be inspired and keep pushing!